A Pioneer of cHaNgE (PART 2)

PART 2

     Meanwhile, we are literally DESTROYING ourselves.  Little do we even realize how small-minded, disgusting and vile we are.  So, not only are we not operating at our full potential, we are also stuck in a reality that makes it impossible to comprehend that potential.  Those 'awakened' ones are trying to reach out to you.  And, sometimes, you make it very hard for us when you call us 'crazy hippies'.

But, we're committed to this, because we've been establishing a relationship with our Creator.  It's just the beginning of the relationship, really.  When we searched around in our open mind, when we approached Her with the appropriate amount of humility and love and curiosity, when we admitted our faults to Her, admitted that we do, in fact, understand right from wrong, well...we made a pact.

The reason God was willing to speak more directly with us was because we opened up everything to Her.  We stood naked and presented our sickest to Her.  We showed Her that true love exists as our spirit.  We showed Her the beautiful Gift she gave us.  We cried and held that Love out to Her.  We told Her that we completely understood what it means to be 'Awakened', that we'd operate in Love always and forever.  That we'd always try to work on ourselves without beating us up too much.  That fear and hate were not to be a part of this thing anymore.  We made a pact.  It all happened in some other dimension inside of us.  I'm pretty sure, for me, my body was in jail during this 'time'.

In return, we were shown a tiny bit of 'something more'.  I can't show you with a picture.  I can't lead you through the woods, I can't teach you ANY of it.  I can only live in love.  I can only offer your mind the opportunity to reconsider who you are.  I can look you in the eyes and show you genuine love.  I can speak these truths and stand RIGHT next to them in a crowd of skeptics.  I'd stand tall and humble and have a 'knowing' look on my face, an approachable disposition to my body language.

My ability to write made my pact with God a bit more 'binding'.  She's agreed to reveal truths, and I've agreed to master the craft of writing so that I can properly display these truths.  A literal channel of God I've become.  I will always do my best to use words in the positive manner they were meant for.  I will ALWAYS speak from the heart.  I will be clear and concise.  Sometimes, I'll still be wrong.  And, that's okay too.

      Perhaps, the way we live our lives has a direct affect on the unseen, spiritual or metaphysical world that exists beyond the limits of our eyes.  Maybe, we can think of the Earth as one living being, as our invisible (imaginary?) friend.  And, therefore, when we destroy and destruct, well, we hurt Her feelings.  Sometimes, she can't control how upset she gets from this.  She feels as though She's been a great friend so far and that there is no reason for us to treat Her this way.  So, she cries and a fucking tsunami happens.

We've given her a name and it's Gaia (although some would argue that Gaia 'told' us her name).  If you ever have trouble envisioning 'God' or 'the universe', and it creates a blockage from you beginning a relationship with 'God' or 'the universe', try picturing the ENTIRE world as 'God'.  A living and breathing planet.  ALIVE, She is.  And, we are INSIDE her and ON Her.  This way, when you think of 'God' in a loving manner, you are taking in the WHOLE thing at once.  It helps to begin the process of treating the world how She deserves to be treated.

Let's consider the possibility that Gaia is self-aware.  She exists, she thinks and she has the ability to create life and all the amazing things that come along with it.  Gaia has the ability to offer her 'children' (anything living on Earth) the ultimate wisdom of the universe, blessings beyond imagination and even infinite life with 100% ecstasy and happiness.  (Have you ever considered such a thing before?)

So far, ever since I sincerely asked my (at the time I called it my) 'spirit guide' if our potential was something like a hidden key in a Zelda game, like a hidden treasure...I was then given another Truth.  The answer was, "God damn right it is.  These are the kinds of blessings ON TOP of blessings that 'we' don't just 'give out' to any old 'human'.  They require a certain amount of understanding, humility, patience, control, strength, etc."

Now, let's explore this Goddess a bit more.  Does she know how to love?  Is she 'good'?  Or, is she dark and hateful?  Well, how's life going for you?  Each person may answer those questions differently.  What remains though, an intuitive slice of universal truth, is that - in due time - the people whose outlook on life is 'dark' or 'negative' end up having 1 of 2 things (if not both) in common.  Every single time.

1)  They focus on the darkness, attract more darkness and begin to label the whole damn thing as a place of darkness.  They overlook the positive and, when negative hits, its the only bright thing in their life because its validating and confirming their 'truth'; that life sucks and then you die.  

This person is always the one telling you you can't do shit, telling you to stop dreaming.  The negative thinking, the negative energy, he is putting out to the world is a disease and its immediately noticeable to anyone existing in the positive light.  You'll sometimes see 'truth authorized', 'love driven' women making an extra effort to look these types of men in the eye and send them compassion.  Maybe in line at the grocery store you've seen this.  The guy had his head down and seemed as if he felt as though he'd be blinded if he looked into her eyes.

All he kept doing was avoiding the exploration of himself.  He was afraid, lonely.  "The world was a 'tough place' and 'tough guys' like me drink whiskey, bitch about women and talk Eagles or Trump."  Bitch and Moan.  

Eventually, they keep meeting 'darker' people, giving them the chance to be grateful.  "Man, I thought I was bad!  THIS fucking GUY's a NUT."  And, there comes a smile and a weird sensation of happiness that lasts until a dark representative reminds him of his dark life.  

This guys given chances to awaken and enlighten.  As we go along on this journey, we should keep our eyes out for
'him'.  We can try harder and be gentle with him.

2)  They agree that the 'darkness' was just a phase that passed away over time, and that the lesson(s) they've learned from the experience was exactly what their soul needed at the time.  Their outlook on life went back (stronger even) to a warm and cozy loving existence.  They went back to 'seeing the light', and viewing the world from a bright perspective.  Having lived through both, they vowed to never return to the darkness again, admitting that a huge part of the struggle was their own inability to be grateful for what they had.  They are humbled and strong.  They are ready for bigger and newer things in life.

And, on top of all this, they can't disregard how 'personal' the experience was, how much it seemed like it was specifically 'designed' or 'meant' for them.  How could so many different factors add up into one beautiful lesson like that?  By chance?  How else is it possible?  There'd be some incredible network of tiny, little events and synchronicities that were available as different 'levels' to the lesson.

The events, the 'signs' - and the meaningful connections between them - would exist as 2 things at the same exact time.  It was always free will.  It was always up to us whether we pondered the little things and tried to find deeper meaning behind them, or whether we ignored them completely.  So, the events were; A)  Amazing little life events, and, B)  Way more than that.  At the same time.

It was how we PERCEIVED them that gave them their power.  It was how we APPROACHED the event when we thought about it.  We either got a little angry and shook it off as, "That damn, fucking neighbor and his lawn mower!"  Or, we looked at the event(s) with a blank slate.  We cleaned off all the conditioning and all of our own dirt before we tried to define what happened.  After we looked back again, we said, "The NEIGHBOR!  If it wasn't for that FUCKING lawnmower, I would've never went to ACME, which means I never ___ and never ____."

This is us manifesting and discovering and thinking with a base thought that's consistently present reminding us, "You don't know shit, bro.  You literally don't know shit."  

Until you start to exist as the honest, loving, humble student - admitting how much you don't know and genuinely asking to be shown 'the way' - you'll always be living in, at least, a part of a lie.  

This is why you hear, 'God is Truth'.  "The truth shall set you free!"  A lie is unneccesary.  Nobody's your judge.  Everyone's learning how to live and coexist.  If you fuck up, talk about it.  You'll learn the lesson faster.  The lie (the pain, the hurt, the guilt) drops away from your soul; your delicate, precious and 'young' soul.

So, a lie to your SELF?  Especially one you live with for years and years?  DAMAGING.  Healable, though.  Always healable.  But, the deeper you pushed your self (your TRUE self, or 'the truth of who you really are') down and disregarded your own intuition and emotion, the 'deeper' the cut.  

Deeper the cut, and a little more healing is needed.  

HERE's the TRUTH...you are forgiven.  Nobody that matters is going to hold anything against you.  The only thing WE want is for you to exist in the light and love yourself.  BE yourself.  Because, you're best is a best I'd like to meet one day.

      If 'person # 2' (the guy who came out from the darkness and used it as a catalyst for growth and new beginnings) does decide to explore the possibility that everything happened to him 'for a reason' - that the 'phase' and all of it's events were, in fact, NOT a product of random luck and chance - then the only natural question we ask next becomes, "If it was a lesson who was the teacher?"  (Hint Hint: It was Gaia).

At this point, they've opened a door in the journey I myself know all too well.

We try to fathom how it could be possible, within an incredible network of tiny little events and 'synchronicities'.  Somehow, they were placed in our path in order to (lightly and politely) 'knock' on a closed door in our conscious.  The teacher used familiarity with emotion to 'show' the student that the teacher is in pure connection with the student (and that She has compassion and good intention, even humor and childlike wonder - just like we do.)

When you have this thought, there's Gaia sitting somewhere in your mind - somewhere perfect - smiling and shaking her head up and down verrrry slowly.  Like she's saying, "Yes, my friend.  Yes, my child.  It's all been done for you.  It's all possible.  Everything's going to be okay."  Some people have this experience and RUN from it.  I'm sure Gaia's kinda' used to that at this point, one of the reasons she approaches us very politely.

      Let's be clear, we CAN NOT help ANYone, or ANYthing, if we have not first helped (healed) ourselves.  Trust and believe that we all need healing, major healing and recovery.  The person you know with the hardest disposition and the 'strongest' attitude towards emotional trauma and pain is the person that needs healing the most.

Here's a good way to understand this, to understand how we've been hurt (and for how long).  We can also try to understand where exactly this trauma and pain 'goes' after it leaves our primary thinking and 'moves' deeper into our subconscious.

You were hurt spiritually the second you accepted the first lie you were told, the second you accepted what you were told about yourself, about your limits, your 'sins' and your 'evil' side.  They shoved certain things down our spiritual throat, until we just HAD to accept that evil existed, either in the 'bad guys' they showed throwing rocks and shit, OR, in the guys telling us to fear the bad guys.  Either way, something very deep, divine and powerful inside of us was being pushed down farther and farther away from us.

I remember Ayn Rand describing this 'place' inside of us (in Atlas Shrugged) as the legendary 'myth' of Atlantis.  That place of perfect.  That place of man, woman and child living and breathing as man, woman and child.  That place these days we only seem to find in a few, fleeting moments.  It's like, we can FEEL what we've FELT at that wedding (you know the feeling of watching a marriage and believing in true love.) ALL the time.  We can take love and grow it into a universal ENERGY that's constantly PULSING through us.  We can be love.  Love, that's strong and powerful and completely OKAY to 'give' to every living thing.

Or, we can watch the fucking Eagles and pretend THAT's the strongest feeling of passion and victory and glory available to us.

Like I said, shit gets deep.  There's lessons inside lessons inside lessons.  I just 'knocked' on football fans for pouring a LOT of themselves into a group of people that make millions of dollars and potentially don't feel the same way in return.  But, there is something to the idea of teamwork, something to the idea of hard work paying off.  And, THAT's worth rooting for.

      In closing, and back to the title of the essay, just know it's completely okay to be the first from your family to address the possibility of traditional change, maybe even a complete change of thinking.  While you have everyone together, you can address your issue, offer a solution and then request feedback from each individual member.  The family decides together what the final decision will be.

This is a great way to initiate change.  What better place to start then with your closest loved ones?

Here's an example:  

Have you ever sat down with your family for Thanksgiving Dinner and held a conversation about the truth behind the holiday you're celebrating?  Or, does your family attempt to 'rise above' the contradiction of this day by going around the table and asking what each of you are grateful for?  

I'm going to assume that over 95% of the people reading this post are not, in fact, American Indian.  And that you, do not in fact, perform reenactments of the Pilgrims famous settlement in your front yard in honor of the 'Native's Gift' to the 'White Man'.  And, safe to say, you probably don't even THINK all that much about the story we were taught growing up about Christopher Columbus; a story that included breaking bread and making peace with strangers (and left out genocide, rape and exactly what the turkeys have to do with it all anyway).

Traditions are cool.  They remind us where we came from, how much we've grown and of all the things we can and should be grateful for.  Certain parts of certain traditions we can hope shall never die.  But, let's be honest...this one's fucking stupid.  And, once it's over, here we go again with fucking Christmas, RAPING my idea of snow-globe's and flying reindeer with marketing tactics and clearance sales and obsession with material things.

The only reason we love Thanksgiving so much is because of how torn apart our family values have gotten.  We barely see each other.  We barely eat together.  Everyone's too busy for family.  

Too busy for family?  

We've forgotten what a good, home-cooked meal with loved ones does for our psyche and well-being.  I guess, really, my advice is, 'Do That More.'  Don't be afraid to have a family meal once a month based on the tradition of family.

      And, maybe, consider the many fables we've come to believe throughout life.  Consider the possibility that any lie you've lived with or believed in against the caution of your true self has damaged your soul, and that damage needs repairing.  Consider the possibility that the truth behind those fables is actually hidden for a reason.  Even some of our innocent and playful nursery rhymes have turned out to have cryptic, disturbing double meanings.  ('Row, row, row your boat' ends up the truest, most positive rhyme ever written when we exchange the word boat with 'vessel' and imagine ourselves floating 'gently down the stream' stress free and 'merry'.)

There's a man named Santos and he teaches Astrotheology.  This is the study of religion and astrology combined into one, amazing idea of what the truth may be concerning the 'sun' of God, the Zodiac, the constellations and why the saying, "As above, so below," carries so much meaning.  The truth it never dies.  For whatever reason that it may be hidden (possibly to keep us asleep, which means possibly to keep us obedient, and subservient to an 'Ungodly' entity.), it doesn't necessarily have to matter.

Again, if we are under the 'control' of a small group of psychopaths, the awakening and the search within for that powerful 'place' we've lost is still the 'answer' to the problem.  The only reason we'd be under anyone's control is if we let them.  

      I'm certain that we can do better.  That we will do better.  And that we are so much more than we currently even realize.  Therefore, there should be no reason for us not to share the common goal of progression, evolution and growth for our race and our planet.  Above that, know it takes time to 'reprogram' yourself.  Start catching negative or pointless thoughts as they come in.  Stop, go backwards and change the thought.  It takes a little practice.  Grabbing a book or watching a video on 'Mindfulness' is what helped me get started.

Before an awakening we must first realize that we've been lulled to sleep.  And that the thing that's asleep is a BEAST.  Don't be scared to be the greatest you can be.  Don't be scared to be different.  And, remember, Gaia is the precious, little girl you loved in 1st grade; pure and beautiful and sort of unsure how to even handle all that she was.  She's also the Mother.  The knowing Mother that feels emotions and loves more than most will ever feel and love.  She doesn't like to be overlooked and stepped upon.  She would like a bit of respect.

After all, she just wants to love you.